Buya “What Is Faith” Student Interviews
April 17, 2011
ParenTeen – Stress II
December 10, 2010
Make time to ask your teen, “What’s your biggest stress right now? What can I do to help you?”
Most parents are not aware of exactly what kind of toll stress is taking on the family life. If your family is in “survival mode” right now, as often happens during the holiday season, considering the following:
- One-third of children age 8 – 17 believe their parent has been always or often worried or stressed out about things during the past month.
- Four in 10 children say they feel sad when their parent is stressed or worried.
- One-third of children (34 percent) say they know their parent is worried or stressed out when they yell. Other signs of parental stress recognized by children are arguing with other people in the house, complaining or telling children about their problems and being too busy or not having enough time to spend with them.
- One in five children worry a lot or a great deal about things in their lives but very few parents (8 percent) report that their child is experiencing a great deal of stress (8, 9 or 10 on a scale of 1 to 10).
- Nearly a third of children indicated in the past month that they experienced physical health symptoms that are often associated with stress: 38 percent reported trouble falling asleep or staying asleep at night. Thirty-three percent experienced headaches and 31 percent reported having an upset stomach in the past month.”
“Overall, these findings suggest that parents are underestimating their child’s awareness of their stress and, therefore, the impact it could be having on their child’s emotional well-being.”
All this info was taken from Kara Powell at the Fuller Youth Institute blog.
The “New” Religion Dominating US Landscape?
October 1, 2010
Moralistic Therapeutic Deism will be the faith that dominates the US as the next generation becomes adults.
“Moralistic Therapeutic Deism…may be the new mainstream American religious faith for our culturally post-Christian, individualistic, mass-consumer capitalist society.”
Guiding Beliefs of Moralistic Therapeutic Deism:
1. A god exists who created and orders the world and watches over life on earth.
2. God wants people to be good, nice, and fair to each other, as taught in the Bible and by most other world religions.
3. The central goal in life is to be happy and to feel good about oneself.
4. God is not involved in my life except when I need God to resolve a problem.
5. Good people go to heaven when they die.
This all comes from the book Almost Christian (Kenda Dean). It’s making me think about how vitally important it is take what I’m engaging with teens at Shoal Creek and make it very specific, so that the message of Jesus is not lumped into a “yah, God forgives me, like what Jesus said, and because I’m living a life that has more good than bad, I’m pretty sure God will let me into heaven” type of faith.
Making me think how important it is to focus on specifics like:
1. Jesus, not just a teacher. He’s the actual Son of God. The meaning/truth of his resurrection.
2. A Christ follower’s main purpose is not to “be nice to others”, but to love God in a self-sacrificial way. That being nice to the people around me does not make up for not be obedient to God’s commandments and Word.
3. Being “good” does not connect me with God and transform me now, nor secure my eternity when I die. Submitting my life to the Father, Jesus, and Spirit of God is what connects me to the One God. This is a commitment/belief that I must be willing to die for.
Another hugely important fact that gives perspective on this new faith that is emerging (or is it just evolving out of all the faiths that want to be attractive, but indistinguishable?) is that it’s not necessarily “new.” The thing is our teens are only adopting what they already observe in our adult culture. So the emerging American adult landscape is not really inventing a new faith.
“Diner-Theology”, 21 is the new 16
September 28, 2010
More thoughts on the what the landscape of teenage faith in America. From “Almost Christian” by Kenda Dean:
Sociologists paint American Christians as restless people who come to church for the same reasons people once went to diners: for someone to serve us who knows our name, for a filling of stew that reminds us of home and makes us feel loved, even while it does a number on our spiritual cholesterol…
…churches seem to have offered teenagers a kind of “diner-theology: a bargain religion, cheap but satisfying, whose gods require little in the way of fidelity or sacrifice. Wondering if this really is accurate to what the faith of an average American, and average teenager? Tried to ask some 6th and 7th grade boys why they came on Sundays and got mixed responses. Several were, “because my parents made me,” (which I don’t think is necessarily bad). Others said the “right” answer: to know more about Jesus. I think there was one out of eight that genuinely meant it when he said he wanted to know more about God.
We have learned to accept twenty-one as the “new sixteen.” Today, adolescence functions as a lifestyle as well as a life stage, a state of consciousness as well as a period of life that young people can and often do prolong, with the full cooperation of American culture. Non-technical translation = our high school graduates are like half-cooked pancakes and kind of doughy in the middle. Responsibility supposedly doesn’t really start until you’re ready to graduate college. I can see this pushing back the average age of starting families, and wonder what that will do to the family unit in a couple generations.
We have known for some time that youth groups do important things for teenagers…but they seem less effective as catalysts for consequential faith, which is far more likely to take root in the rich relational soil of families, congregations, and mentor relationships where young people can see what faithful lives look like… It will ALWAYS be the parents/family unit that affects a student’s faith more than anything else. Youth ministry emerged 50 years ago to come alongside this new phenomenon called “adolescence.” It should always be supplementing that family unit, and not taking center stage in spiritual formation in a teen’s life.
One thing have I seen be most effective in the spiritual formation of teenagers and families in the 5 years I’ve served at Shoal Creek: families (parents and students) that serve one service and attend a second service.
Elevate Weekly Update
September 28, 2010
Hey Families, here’s what’s up:
1. Need Feedback! If your student went to the Fall Retreat a week ago, PLEASE ask them what they thought and email me back! If the things we’re doing are ineffective, then I don’t want to waste time doing them. So please get me just a couple comments and let me know if last weekend made a difference them.
2. Eyes On AIDS – I need some volunteer students, and a couple parents. Race cleanup is a GREAT way to get involved with making the Eyes On AIDS Race successful. it’ll take 30-45 minutes, and you won’t miss any of the fun. We still need about 8-10 students to make this happen. If you can help, please let me know!
3. Next Crash Small Group Study – Good Sex 2.0 – Starting Oct 13th, our Crash (9th-12th) graders will be discussing God’s plan for our sexuality. This is a subject we’re not taking lightly, or doing it just because it’s a “hot topic.” We really do want teens at Shoal Creek (and beyond) to begin to understand and align themselves with God’s intended desire for our sexuality, and we believe the Church should be proactive.
Parents, if you have any concerns or questions about this next study, I invite you to call me and talk to me personally. My email is justin.talley@shoalcreek.org, if you can leave me a message there I will get back to you this week.
If there are enough parents interested in taking steps themselves in being understanding how they can help their teens, it’s possible for us to get you some resources, or even get some parents meetings together, but I will need to know your interest level.